


do as you like

by middnighter



Series: tumblr prompts [4]
Category: Green Lantern (Comics), The Flash (Comics)
Genre: :/, M/M, sorry for the angst, this is not a happy fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-06-17
Packaged: 2019-05-24 17:38:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14959086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/middnighter/pseuds/middnighter
Summary: A morning like every other.





	do as you like

**Author's Note:**

> i'm not feeling so good so i'm taking it out on barry. sorry!

It was a morning like every other. Barry woke up in his bed and reached out next to him with his hand, only to find empty sheets. The bed was still warm, and Barry drew the covers back over his head and around himself. He was going to enjoy it as long as he could.

Hal never stayed the night, but Barry always checked when he woke up, just to be sure. 

A morning like every other.

Barry tried not to let his heart ache too much.

_If only he missed me._

_If only he wanted to stay._

Barry knew, going into this friends with benefits arrangement with Hal, that he would never get a real relationship out of it. That just wasn't the Hal way. 

He breathed in deeply, and stood up. He walked out of his bedroom — _depressingly his, never theirs, no matter how much he wanted it to be_ — and into the kitchen, turning the coffee maker on.

Barry checked his phone while he waited for the water to boil. He ran out of apps to refresh by the time the coffee maker was done. He poured himself a mug. 

Now that the coffee machine wasn't purring anymore, Barry became aware of the silence of the room. He thought about putting on some music to drown it out but decided against it, instead taking in the absence of noise, the absence of life, like a cold shower after a bad dream.

A morning like every other.

Barry swallowed past the lump in his throat. 

On the counter, his phone was daring him to pick it up, to call Hal and ask him if he was missing Barry as much as Barry missed him, if they weren't just two idiots unable to figure out that their feelings were returned.

Barry knew what Hal would answer. Hal was fine with only sex, and did not need all the other stuff, the stuff that made Barry miserable in the mornings, waking up to an empty bed. Hell, Hal probably didn't even know Barry was miserable. 

_Pick me up,_ his phone said.  _He'll never know if you don't tell him._

Which was exactly the point. Barry did not want to lose what he already had. And he knew that if he were to bring up something like _feelings_ , Hal would back off all the way to the other end of the galaxy.

So Barry had no idea why he picked up his phone and dialed Hal's number. Maybe this morning was different. Maybe this morning was exactly like all the other mornings.

Maybe Hal felt the same way.

Barry was about to hang up and give up when Hal picked up. "Hello?"

"Hey, it's Barry," he said, a dull ache in the back of his throat.

"What's up?" Barry could hear the confusion in his voice. "Did I forget my pants at your place or something?"

It was killing Barry, how much Hal was able to be casual with this.

"No— __no. I, uh..."

"What is it?"

"I was thinking about us."

"About us?"

"Yeah. About you and me. About how, maybe, you could... you could hang around here more. In the mornings. Be here when I wake up. This sort of thing."

Barry tried to keep his voice steady and carefree, but Hal saw right through it. Hal always did.

"Listen," Hal said, "I don't think that would work."

"Why not? We could make it work, if we gave it try." The desperate edge in his voice didn't want to go away.

Hal tried to hide a sigh but Barry heard it anyway. "Barry, I don't know where you're getting this. You and I, we're not a _thing_."

"But I—but what about—  _us_?" 

"There was never an us," Hal's voice said on the other end of the line, and something in Barry shattered —probably his heart. And then, a little softer, Hal said, "I'm sorry."

Barry swallowed.

"Maybe I shouldn't come over anymore," Hal said apologetically. "Sorry for misleading you. Really wasn't my intention."

"Well, we..." Barry said after a moment, and paused. "Do as you like. If you think that's for the best, I'm fine with that." He wasn't.

"I'm sorry, Barry", Hal said. "Goodbye." And he hung up. 

In Barry's dreams, love was a sunrise peeking through his curtains, slowly lighting up his bedroom, the sheets of his bed, and the man he loved.

Barry longed for the night.


End file.
